Not knowing which way to go next is part of the human condition.  As Mark Twain once said:

“I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life.  The problem is that I can’t find anybody who can tell me what they want…”

In fact a lot of people (myself included) first come to coaching precisely because they can’t see the way ahead – but do know that something needs to change.  There are a number of ways that coaching can help here:

discovering the motivation to change – what brought you to here?  how do you want things to be different?

accessing resourceful states – how do you want to feel, to live, to be? eg relaxed, confident, smiling, powerful.  These are things you can have now…

identifying possibilities and choices - there may well be options you want to pursue but are limiting because you think you “can’t”.  Hopes, dreams, aspirations and desires might become stronger once you realise what’s possible…

exploring your values – helping you to identify the things that matter, that are precious to you and that you want to express and enjoy in the future

negotiating the transition – sometimes you just need another person who is completely on your side, challenging, but non-judgemental, to walk with you through some of the toughest stretches of the most difficult periods of change. You might not know what lies ahead – but you know you need to keep on walking.

It’s one of the reasons I love coaching through stories and metaphors – it gives you the breathing space to explore possibilities in a less demanding, more creative kind of way.  You might not know what your goals are for the time-frame ahead.  But I’m guessing that you do know you want things to change.  That there’s a door you’re ready to open.  An entrance you’re ready to walk through.

A different story that’s waiting to be told.

“Life coaching is like an exciting voyage of self-discovery. I started off thinking I had one set of issues that I needed to deal with – things I ‘ought’ to do to be a better, healthier person, like lose weight, go to the gym, give up smoking. Coaching made me realise that I had been carrying around a long list of ‘must do’ issues for years, which had weighed me down to such an extent that I felt paralysed. The role of my coach was critical to this process of growing self-awareness. By offering non-judgemental, insightful questions and
comment she helped me to see what I really needed to do differently and where I really want to get to. I came away from sessions feeling energised and positive and clear about the steps I needed to take. These were always practical, manageable and realistic. During the course of coaching my energy levels rose, I began to feel much more positive about my life and am gradually learning not to go through life with a big millstone round my neck with the words ‘must do’, ‘should do’, ‘guilt’ on them. I feel like I am enjoying life and being me for the first time in years. I could not have reached this point withoutthe insight and support of my coach.”

And that, for me, is what coaching is all about. Finding the key that will allow you to enjoy life again and just be: yourself…